The Freedom of Not Caring Anymore
Image courtesy of D&AD
There’s a certain topic of conversation doing the rounds lately — especially among women in their late forties and early fifties. I keep hearing things like, “I just don’t give a toss anymore” and “Who cares at this point?” Not in a defeatist way, but in a powerful, freeing one. It’s about shaking off the shackles — whatever they may be — and finally embracing life and work entirely on our own terms. For me, that newfound liberation has shown up in all sorts of ways. One of the most unexpected? I’ve started vlogging.
Yes, that’s right. I’ve become one of those people — the ones who wander around events and festivals with a gimbal and camera, talking to themselves and sharing glimpses of work life as the founding editor of Creative Boom.
Why now? Because why the f**k not?
I’m tired of the voices in my head, in society, from other women, men, whoever, all suggesting that I shouldn’t do these things. That I should be quieter. Smaller. More “appropriate” for my age. Or, heaven forbid, not too big for my boots. Whatever. I’m done with holding myself back.
Besides, how could I not create video content when it feels like such a natural, joyful extension of what I already do?
Being an art and design journalist is about curiosity. It’s about telling stories, meeting people, uncovering how they work and why they do what they do. If I can share some of that behind-the-scenes magic through video — in a way that feels real and unfiltered — then that’s fantastic. It feels like a gift.
I’m 47 years old — a 1978 baby. We’re a generation that came of age in private. We remember the world before digital. We wound cassette tapes with biros. Went to video rental stores. Rode bikes and played outside until it was time for dinner. And dreamt of Jordan Catalano looking our way.
We also survived the ‘90s and 2000s — a wild, often brutal time to be a working woman. Although things have improved, there is still a long way to go.
What’s mad is how we’ve spent our lives tiptoeing around so much — softening our edges, keeping the peace — and then, just as our faces begin to soften and our hair turns grey, we’re expected to disappear? Really?
I’ve watered myself down so I wouldn’t threaten other women. I’ve kept my mouth shut more times than I can count. I’ve watched my own sex pull up the ladder when I thought they might lend a hand.
And now I’m supposed to lie down and what… fade away quietly? No. F**king. Way.
So I’ve started vlogging. This is my current answer to everything. Put myself out there, have a huge load of fun, and do what I enjoy the most: chatting with people, uncovering stories, and sharing it all with our Creative Boom audience.
I’ve truly grown up with my platform. It turns 16 this July — like a daughter, really. Which, at my age, I’m certainly old enough to have. And if Creative Boom were my daughter? I’d tell her this:
Hey, love. Don’t let the bastards get you down. Don’t take it personally if other women aren’t as into sisterhood as you’d hoped. And report any man who comments on your boobs during office hours — though hopefully, you won’t need to anymore. Not in this day and age.
I’d tell her everything I’ve learned, hoping she could skip a few of the heartbreaks and wrong turns. But most of all, I’d say this: Be whoever you want to be. Ignore the noise. Be kind, be courteous — but always stay suspicious of anyone who tells you to pipe down.
And if they do? Ask yourself this: Why are they so desperate for your silence?
You can find my new vlogging adventures over on Creative Boom’s YouTube channel. I’ve called it Editor’s Cut — a new series that gives you a backstage pass to life behind Creative Boom. I’ll be sharing unfiltered moments, creative discoveries, and candid reflections from the heart of the industry.
As the new playlist reads: “From studio visits and design events to personal takes on the creative life, this is the raw footage that didn’t make the headlines — but might just inspire your next big idea.”
For the debut episode, I’m at London’s South Bank for the D&AD Festival, one of the creative industry’s most iconic events. Please take a moment to check it out and leave a comment if you’ve got any feedback.
And that’s another thing: never be afraid to start something new. Who cares if it’s not perfect? What are we really waiting for?
There’s joy in the process — in the messiness, the mistakes, the momentum. And I’ll be taking you along with me.